I'll take one large helping...of humble pie, please!

Well I had my IFBB Pro women's physique debut this weekend and all I can say is that it was a huge reality check for me.  I woke up on the Monday before the show completely shredded and down to 100 lbs on my scale.  My husband and I freaked out and started adding carbs and taking away cardio to "fill me back out".  Needless to say, that was a terrible idea.  By the time I got to the stage on Saturday, my body had rejected all of my hard work over the past 4 months.  It held every carb I ate and all the water I drank just stayed under my skin.  That resulted in a smooth and soft look- the opposite of what I'd envisioned for my pro debut!  Everyone said to me, "Wow you looked great, but I couldn't really see your abs" or "Your routine was awesome but your legs looked soft".  Those are not the comments I was hoping to hear after working so hard to get ready for the show!

In all honesty, I knew I was bloated when I went on stage.  I could feel it and see it.  In fact, miserable is the word I would use to describe myself before I went up there.  But, I had to "save face" and just try and hope that the judges would be swayed by my personality and presentation.  So, I strutted my stuff through my 60 second routine and hit my poses as best I could (bloated abs and all) with a huge smile on my face.  Unfortunately my charm didn't didn't win out as I placed 8th out of 9 competitors.  After I got off stage after getting the last call out from the judges, I cried a little in the bathroom to relieve my stress, and then pulled myself together so nobody would know how upset I was.  My husband creates all my diets and he wanted to blame himself, but we were both at fault for this one.  I shouldn't have looked at the results from the first two pro physique shows this year.  





Johnny (4th place NPC Men's Physique A)  and me backstage



The girls that won those shows were pretty smooth and not very big.  Instead of realizing that they were the best ones there and not the "ideal" look for the division, I assumed that I would be going in too conditioned as I was early last week.  After the contest, I spoke with several of the the judges about what exactly I should change and where I need to improve.  By the way, this is the best piece of advice I can give to any competitor.  You'll be fresh in their minds since they just got done seeing you on stage and they'll get to know your name and face.  Anyways, they told me that I needed to be tighter (which I already knew), needed a better fit for my suit bottoms, and that I could also put on a little more muscle.  I also learned in speaking to them that tight, conditioned, and lean are all fine, just not "dry" like a bodybuilder.  That made complete sense and we've now re-strategized for my next competition in 3 weeks. 

Later that night I went ahead and "celebrated" my pro debut with some Taco Bell (they're open late...)and some cookies with frosting.  I slept almost all day Sunday and yesterday I started my new cardio regime.  I'm kicking it up a notch and will come into the next show tight, conditioned, and looking the best that my body can look!  I know what looks good on my body and you should go with what looks good on you too!!!

"Failure will not overcome me so long as my will to succeed is stronger" - Micheal S. Kirby

Peak Week- It's finally here!

For the past 4 months, I've been dieting and working my butt off to get to this point- peak week!  Time seems to drag on for the first 6-8 weeks, but after that it has this "snowball effect" and the days just sneak away from me until all of a sudden it's contest time!  It's been a turbulent few months- dealing with my stomach issues, my stubborn thigh fat, and just getting my head around starting the season earlier than anticipated. 

Finally, a dress that fits!

But overall I have to say that this season has been more about self-discovery and a feeling of "coming into my own" than just trying to get super lean and compete.  I'm finally going to step on stage in a division in which I really feel at home.  It's like trying on several different dresses until you find that perfect one.  Once you put that dress on, you just know it's right because it fits like a glove and makes you feel beautiful.  That's actually how I feel in the Women's Physique Division.  I tried bodybuilding but knew I couldn't get muscular enough without "pharmaceutical" help- and that simply has never been an option that I'm willing to explore.  Then I tried figure, which was an okay fit as long as I didn't flex my muscles.  Literally just standing on stage was what I had to do for 3 years and eventually that got boring.  I work my butt off every day in the gym and lift heavy to build my muscles naturally so you better believe that I want to show them!  When this new division finally came along, it felt like a breath of fresh air!  I encourage any girl who's not comfortable in their current division to try some other ones out.  There are so many options to choose from now that there's bound to be one that's a perfect fit.  You'll never know until you try so why not?  If you're having trouble deciding on a category, ask your coach or get feedback from the judges (which is what I did) and let them help you to decide in which division you should compete.  I think it's important to work with your body not against it- so picking a division that will showcase your physique in the best possible light is imperative if you want to succeed in this sport.

A lot of people ask what peak week consists of for me.  Well, here I am loading up on water for the next few days until I start depleting, and going to the ladies' room every 10 minutes (I've already gotten up twice while writing this!).  Since I'm as lean as I want to be, this week's workouts will be all about pushing blood into the muscles.  Light cardio sessions, squeezing muscles on my weight lifting days, and flexing between sets will help in bringing out any needed definition.  Plus, practicing my posing conditioning and polishing my routines will carve out those lines and help me to feel more confident on stage.  My focus in this contest will be on showing the judges my feminine muscularity and engaging the audience.  I've got a 2 minute routine for the night show to a slowish, girlie, dubstep mix (I know that sounds weird) and a 60 second routine for the morning show done to their house music.  All I want is that "I can't look away from her!" reaction...that's what brings the win :-) 

Now, let's see how it goes... 

2 weeks out: Small changes = BIG results!

So 2 weeks out from the Governors Cup and I'm feeling great! In my last blog I was stressed out, tired, unmotivated, and actually wondering why I was putting myself through all of this.  In fact, most of the time around this point, I really start dragging a*% and turn into mean zombie woman. But this time, Mike's actually been able to increase my food so my metabolism has revved up into high gear! I feel like a "normal person" again...and once you start competing, "normal" becomes a feeling you treasure.

I've talked about how much our bodies hate change. It doesn't matter how great of shape someone's in, a body still wants to resist what you're doing. I should know because my body loves to go to battle every contest season. It's constantly trying to hinder all my calorie burning efforts, but my determination seems to force it to change each year.  In my last blog I spoke about how I needed a good kick in the butt and that seems to have done the trick!  I'm back to feeling like my old self again.  I can feel the fire and excitement inside knowing that my contest date is so near!  Now it's crunch time for all of my final preparations- jewelry for the suit, perfecting the posing routines, and all the other little miscellaneous things too (makeup, eyelashes, etc).  

My nerves have calmed down a lot since seeing the outcome of the first pro women's physique contest.  There's such a big variety of competitors (bodybuilders and figure girls) entering this division that it's been unclear as to what physiques they'll be rewarding.  But, from what I've been hearing they don't want the girls too muscular, too hard, and only about 20% larger than a figure girl.  I think that if they stick to that criteria, I should fit comfortably within those parameters.  But, I also know that judging is subjective and really just depends on who shows up.  There seems to be several girls from other IFBB pro divisions who are switching over to WPD, but I'm going to look at it as earning my place in the division.  I really am only competing against myself and I believe that my physique has improved from last year so in that regard, I've already won. 

So the contest season is about to finally kick off for me.  I've been waiting since July of 2011 to hit that stage again and now it's right around the corner.  For the next 2 weeks, I'm focusing on my conditioning, food intake, and most of all sleep!  I'm still lifting as heavy as possible, but really concentrating in on etching out those details and pushing as much blood into the muscles as possible.  I'm not one of those competitors who believes in lightening weights, increasing reps, and doing 2 hours of cardio a day.  Being a natural competitor, I start dieting early and keep my weight gain minimal off- season to avoid needing to make drastic changes in my contest prep.  I plan on hitting the stage with a healthy body that glows and hopefully that will appeal to the judges!  We'll see what happens...